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In today’s episode of “Healing from Within” your host Sheryl Glick author of Life Is No Coincidence, The Living Spirit and her next book New Life Awaits, which offer stories of awakening, transforming, and transcending physical life, welcomes Allison Carmen whose new book The Gift of Maybe offers a realistic approach to fight a powerful addiction many people have an addiction to Certainty which only makes us feel anxious and afraid. This condition of Certainty is definitely an impossibility: to be in control of events or completely know the future…the beauty is in learning to allow accept and surrender to challenges, doing your best and trusting that life is merely a series of experiences, neither good nor bad, just leading us to know ourselves and the world in more loving ways.
Most of Sheryl’s listeners are aware that in navigating the course of life in ways that help us though challenges we preserve hope joy and success and rely on attitudes that really work. It is in the “Becoming or knowing” life from an inner perspective as well as the physical reality, that allows us to transcend fear and anxiety and to regain courage and balance in the process.
In today’s episode of Healing From Within we will discover how it is possible to move from the fear of desperately wanting to know or predict what will happen next and to find hope and freedom when we discover there is another possibility and that is the concept of MAYBE.. This attitude may be a tool to cope with many of life’s unpredictable and changing realities.
Sheryl wonders if there were any books, teachers, or experiences that began Allison’s search for a way to deal with the stresses of life. Allison writes, “The need to know the future had gripped me as a teenager and even when I was at the top of my career as an attorney. I was deeply unhappy and suffering physically. No doctor could identify my illness, but my symptoms included an array of infections, allergies anxiety and depression. So I turned to alternative medicine, meditation, acupuncture, and any other practice I thought might relieve my physical and emotional pain. I even became best friends with a woman with psychic abilities in hopes she could lift the veil of uncertainty and tell me what the future had in store for me.”
The story that changed everything for Allison was told to her by her Qigong teacher. “One day a farmer’s horse ran away. His neighbor came by and said, “You have the worst luck.” The farmer replied to the neighbor, “Maybe.” The next day the horse returned with five mares, and the neighbor said, “You have the best luck.” The farmer said Maybe?….the day after that the farmer’s son was riding the horse and fell off and broke his leg and the neighbor came by and said to the farmer, “You have the worst luck.” The farmer replied, “Maybe.” The next day the army came looking to draft the boy for combat. But he could not go because his leg was broken. The neighbor came by and said. You have the best luck,” Again the farmer said, Maybe……”
Sheryl relates to Allison’s story and says, “For me it really is not about luck at all…my first book Life Is No Coincidence shows that events in our lives are not random but loaded with opportunities for us to remember who we are…spiritual beings having a physical life, and no matter what challenge or event or state of mind.. trust in a bigger plan or higher power empowers us. This Universal life force or soul essence helps us learn that life is a gathering of experiences-- neither good or bad-- just needed for us to learn to know more about our eternal soul essence and learning this removes for some people, many fears of physical life. We can begin to see a multidimensional world of hope and possibilities.”
Allison goes on to say that this world of “Maybe” created hope because it allowed her to see the infinite ways that every situation could unfold..but Sheryl suggests that maybe it also showed her that these possibilities were simply there for her to discover free will and to make choices for her own well-being and growth.
No matter how events turn out you do have the experience your soul may need for its own development. I believe that accepting that reality takes away the fear of Certainty.
Allison wrote “Overtime I have come to realize that Maybe is a place, a philosophy a seed a magic elixir all at once. Maybe is the part of uncertainty where endless possibilities live and breathe….a mind-set that suggests that for every situation we experience there are numerous ways it may resolve……maybe I will be all right no matter what happens.”
Sheryl says that idea seems to be the key to freedom and the end of fear. Acceptance, allowance, and surrendering no matter what it is comes and goes, and in the end, we are eternal spirits learning and growing through any experience.”
The quote given by Khalil Gibran shows us that attitude is indeed the key to freedom and faith at the same times. His quote says “Your living is determined not so much by what life brings to you as the attitude you bring to life, not so much by what happens to you as by the way your mind looks at what happens.”
The philosophy of Maybe simply states that for every situation we face there are numerous possibilities of resolution and within these possibilities exists a hope that ,”it could be good,” it could get better,” or we could find a way to accept the situation we are facing and still be all right.” Humans have an amazing ability to forget that one of the few things in life we can count on is change. The minute things take an unexpected turn, we tend to get bogged down in uncertainty…but once we apply the idea of Maybe we can see that the cycle of change is never ending. Every outcome offers more possibilities ahead. What seems difficult and unexpected at one moment can lead to something truly amazing in the next…Maybe allows us to transform our pain and fear in an uncertain future into hope and peace in the moment.
The story of US Olympian Michael Phelps that Allison shares shows how fear self doubt and circumstance can work to your benefit. Before the Beijing games Phelps fell and sustained a micro fracture in his wrist. Michael though it was all over and he was finished. Despite his uncertainty and self-doubt that his injury created, Michael got back in the pool a few weeks after surgery and was confined to kicking in the poll rather than swimming…all that kicking strengthened his legs, and Michael Phelps is the first person to ever win eight gold medals in a single Olympics.
Allison gives a quote Sheryl likes from another guest of this show, Dan Millman author of Way of the Peaceful Warrior, “Faith means living with uncertainty…feeling your way through life, letting your heart guide you like a lantern in the dark.”
Many people talk about being present in the moment instead of worrying about the future.
Sheryl says “As an intuitive medium exploring the world of energy I have found that the past present and future are happening simultaneously. Some of our energy is in the present moment and some still in the past or future, as energy cannot be destroyed, neither can our inner or soul essence. There is no death.
In The Living Spirit, Sheryl wrote, “Through my readings, clients begin to understand their spiritual connections to a higher dimension where souls who depart their physical bodies now reside and communicate with all souls on the Earth plane… I believe our loved ones in spirit guide us to expand our understanding of our soul nature. They knew us in their physical lives, but after crossing over they may become our teachers, helping us to gain knowledge of life, death, and how to navigate this three dimensional physical plane called Earth. There is a universal sphere of continuous knowledge beyond Earth. It is the point where the past present and future merge. In reality there really is not past present future. There is only energy. Souls are either experiencing life in a physical or spiritual world and evolving creating and developing greater faith hope compassion and love wherever they reside.”
Like the quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, “Knowledge is knowing that we cannot know.” By thinking that way it is possible to keep hope alive…. Allison wrote “Trying to replace every negative thought with a positive thought can be an overwhelming task….”
You don’t have to battle your negative thinking….Instead Maybe dilutes the power negative thinking has over us by inviting us to see other ways a situation can work out. If a negative thought or a fear is not a fact that will surely happen then what are some other possibilities. When we acknowledge that there is more than one way that a situation can unfold negative thoughts lose their hold on us and cannot control us….the power of our mind to embrace uplifting possibilities and release fear and negativity becomes stronger as we practice this skill…embrace what is possible turn away from what does not serve us well….over and over again until we create a mindset and intention for what we really want and need.
Allison suggests to readers how to begin to embrace a new mindset and free themselves from endless worrying. She says, “It’s Ok to feel sad anxious or disappointed. Yes but it is essential to feel them and allow them to shift and Let Go…. Nothing lasts forever and we cannot hold on to the moment only live in each moment. Try to move away from Linear thinking which suggests that there is a right and wrong way for our lives to unfold knowing there can be many ways to achieve our goals and by opening our minds and hearts we can see a bigger view of life and possibilities. Accept what happens not as a defeat but as possibly not right for you and an opportunity for something else that’s better to emerge.. example you don’t get into a school you thought you wanted…you don’t get the job or boyfriend…If it doesn’t happen might not be right time or a good place for you to be..maybe Spirit is protecting you or providing something better……”
Allow accept and surrender and you will be peaceful and confident that life is going exactly as it is supposed to. Also remember Resistance is futile …banging your head against the wall will not change anything except hurt you…..again Change yourself…Improve but let others have the same opportunity.
Allison Carmen author of The Gift of Maybe has shown ways to move past her unsustainable addiction to Certainty. Her need to conquer the fear or need to know the future and to control life even before the miracles experiences unfold that offer the possibilities for knowing life in its infinite array of wonder and hope.
Allison and Sheryl have discovered yet another tool in the way that our personal inner power may be recognized or restored if need be, and how we may learn to live in the present moment aware of the past, hopeful for the future, and courageous and brave in our new found attitudes to living life fully. In the hope of “Maybe” which offers an array of possibilities beyond just the obvious results of seeing life as either good or bad for that view is ultimately limiting and ineffectual…….we can find a successful purposeful and prosperous life journey.
Allison wrote… “The idea of Maybe allows us to keep a positive and hopeful vision of our lives and at the same time frees us from defining each and every moment as either good or bad. It is simply too painful to hold onto every event we do not like in our lives, seeing them as tragic and finite. What a joy to realize that the unexpected does not have to define our experiences, but instead opens up opportunities to find new ways to accomplish our goals..”
Allison and Sheryl would have you see that while the future may present itself in ways that you think you are unprepared to handle, the growing ability you develop to look at life in many open ended ways with courage and boldness may be more valuable than you might yet realize…”Maybe” along with other spiritual tools show you how much help you have from those above in Spirit, and also from those in your everyday life who only wish for your greatest joy: learning to love life as it is, and accept all challenges as they present. Nothing is random and everything changes rapidly, so be hopeful, and be kind to yourself.
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