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Authentic Answers For Faithful Seekers
- Pastor Tobin Crenshaw
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Welcome to “Healing From Within.” I am your host Sheryl Glick author of The Living Spirit Answers for Healing and Infinite Love which shares stories of spiritual communication, healing energies, miracles, and ways to enhance your intuition relationships and awareness of Universal Energy and am most delighted to welcome Pastor Tobin Crenshaw author of The Beautiful Lie as he offers a way to find faith in a world gone mad.
As listeners of “Healing from Within” are well aware Sheryl and her distinguished guests share intimate stories and insights into both our physical and spiritual worlds as we seek to merge the best of both and live with tried and true remnants of our soul memories helping us to understand maneuver and create our best lives by finding truth and trust in the bigger plan of Spirit both individually and collectively for our evolving world.
In today’s episode of “Healing from Within” Pastor Crenshaw shares an unusual story of how like 20,000 pastors who leave the ministry every year, he joined that group in 2009 and began a deep inward spiritual journey as he worked full time in the criminal justice field. Five years later a quadruple homicide committed by a person he had hoped to rehabilitate and whom he held high hopes for led him back to the pulpit. Pastor Tobin Crenshaw helps us explore the six human needs that drive all human behavior, and how to experience lasting joy and the best tool for improving marriage and indeed all aspects of interaction with people and experiences in life.
When Pastor Tobin is asked to think back to his childhood and remember a person place or event that may have shown him or others the life path he would likely follow as an adult he immediately tells us that he lived with his mother who was a single parent for him and his other brothers and encouraged them all to reach for their goals in a loving and also practical way. He also remembers his grandmother who whenever she saw him always clapped her hands in delight and approached life with a smile.
Sheryl remarks that almost 65 percent of marriages are ending in divorce in this very complex materialistically based environment that is causing many problems for modern day families and often the children are raised in poverty some become addicts and many do not reach their true potential to approach life in the joyful manner that your mother and grandmother established for you.
Pastor Crenshaw tells us that though he was guided to become a pastor he left in 2009 because he became aware of the limitations of many of the people working in the field and sought to explore the nature of life through the spiritual eyes of practices that were open to many different ways to view spirit life the Universe and love. Very few pastors return once they leave but he returned after working in the criminal justice field as he found a need to reconcile spiritual truths with life time challenges realizing that forgiveness was needed and could be felt even when evil still existed in the world.
Pastor Tobin’s time away from the pulpit was dedicated to finding answers for lasting change. Sheryl says that to live in the real world offers spiritual teachers ways to understand their human needs and connection both to spirit and to the physical life we are presently living.
Sheryl remembers that at some point in downloading inspiration from spiritual messages and practicing Reiki Energy Spiritual healing on clients she was so overwhelmed by the changes happening to her and totally committed to learn more so she actually asked God if it was necessary for her to go into seclusion like monks do, and retreat from the world for greater connection to Universal Source. Trying to find an answer how to proceed forward to use her new found spiritual awareness she opened a small book, a gift with spiritual messages from an Englishman she met at a healing retreat and just opened to a random page. Sheryl read, ”In your case, it is not necessary to go to the mountains to share the love of Spirit. You must be among the people and serve.” Well the message said something to that effect and my question was answered.
Many people think the best tool for improving a marriage is learning how to communicate in a clearer more honest way. But Pastor Tobin thinks we may know how to communicate but may not know the person very well and their needs so we are missing the mark for finding greater connection and love. It is important to meet your spouse’s six needs (certainty, variety, love significance, growth contribution ) and to meet their needs in the way they want. But of all the tools for improving relationships none compares to the impact of “praying together,” the one thing that reduces divorce rates more than any other.
Sheryl might mention In regard to that thought of more fully knowing your spouse and how to love them better in her book, The Living Spirit Sheryl wrote, “Life is about loving what is, which is never perfect—just in a state of conscious change. If we forget about perfection and just be, we will find love in our journey. Everything is perfect for self-discovery, thus perfection is the ability to accept imperfection. There is no normal or abnormal and no one way to live, love, or develop our own personal paths. We are all dealing with wounds from this as well as previous incarnations, and as such are wounded citizens of the Cosmos. So there are methods to achieve balance courage and self-confidence in pursuit of life goals and it is nice for us to help our spouse and children know we hope they find their own path and we can support them.”
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl share how to tap into the intelligence of the heart to live a more meaningful life. The brain and the heart are very connected. When a person is frustrated they are out of sync. When a person is at peace and happy their brain and heart waves are in sync, something that can be read on a monitor. You can make them go in sync with a simple breathing technique thus producing peacefulness in less than two minutes.
Pastor Tobin wrote, “How important is a healthy spiritual bond in a marriage? In a stunning study by Gallup Research It was found, “For couples that pray together every night the divorce rate goes from a staggering one in two to just one in 1052! So pray for things that you are passionate about.
He gives us other wonderful quotes such as this one…..Pablo Neruda wrote, “I don’t know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep, it is your eyes that close.”
Shalom Arush a marriage counselor in the Middle East shares the two most important keys to a successful relationship are to spend an hour a day in prayer for the health of your marriage and to never criticize your wife. It is about leaving the boy and becoming the man you are meant to be. One of the earliest texts in scripture says a man is to leave his mother and father and be united with his wife.” You don’t need your mother any longer to tell you what a good boy you are. And your woman doesn’t want you to need mommy. In fact it sickens her. “ What she needs is for you to step up and show up daily with strength and integrity. And author John Gray offers another important idea that helps to foster a loving marriage, “There is no greater gift you can give a man than giving him a task that he can carry out for you or that he can accomplish. A man bonds through action… but he needs to know it will make a difference to you.” So loyalty love and knowing what to focus attention on are important keys for a successful marriage.
Tom Marshall affirms we are all born with two needs: the need for love and the need for significance. There is a simple tool Pastor Tobin tells us that can end the cycle of habituation or simply being aware of the problems they are enduring endlessly through boredom or lack of paying attention to what has become common place for them and that is the “ten minute rule, “It requires for the first ten minutes upon coming home both the husband and wife show nothing but excitement to be together and discuss nothing but positive events. Both put themselves in an empowering state before coming together and generate enthusiasm
The first step for anyone that wants to make a positive change is to recognize that a change is needed and possible. A true decision means that a person has reached a tipping point where they will no longer settle for how things have been. The moment a decision is made, everything begins to change. One effective strategy for making positive changes is to stop using word curses. Starting things like “This will never change, “ or I tried that in the past and it did not work, can cause subconscious blocks.
Sheryl says..I often tell my clients that in the course of every day almost 75 percent of the thoughts that float into our minds will be negative, but the key is to not engage those thoughts and hold them in the running story in your brain making them your reality…Disengage and wait for more positive inspirational ideas and suggestions to float in and embrace those.
Pastor Tobin goes on to say “The words you use make you feel a certain way: they create emotions. What you tell yourself on a consistent basis is everything. Moore and Gillette state, “Words, in fact, define our reality: they define our worlds.”
Sometimes all that is needed is someone to point us in a different direction. Different standards, different life. Remember that and you will go far in making positive changes.
Kaurek Ashley shares, The most successful habit, or success muscle you can develop for yourself—the habit that will guarantee you the happy, healthy, wealthy, successful, fulfilled life you deserve—is the habit of being consistent and relentless in making sure you’re constantly filling your mind with only positive empowering thoughts.
Pastor Tobin tells us of two divinely inspired stories in his book. The first one is about Ken Gaub a musician with a traveling band who felt like his life was stagnant and he wasn’t making a difference with his work. Ken Gaub on tour walked by a pay phone and heard it ringing so he picked up the receiver. The person on the other end was suicidal and prayed to speak with Ken and the person who was trying to help him heard the numbers in his head and dialed them. Ken Gaub was by that very phone at that very moment at the gas station and was able to help that person. Ken continued with his music and that person continued to live.
The other story was of a little girl that was kidnapped by a group of bad men and as she tried to escape was saved by a pride of lions that mauled her captors. Then the lions sat down beside her to protect her until the police came. The lions left and were never seen again. The story made international news. There are angels that help us protect us to complete our life journey and miracles that come from divine intervention. Sheryl has stories of miracles and help from Spirit in her next book New Life Awaits: The Eyes of Spirit Share Evolution Revolution Global Awakening.
Sheryl says that she was recently contacted by a former guest of the show Ruth Anderson who was creating a summit for Enlightened World Enlightened Women living their spiritual path and Ruth said that in meditation she was told that 500,000 angels are now on the planet working with us to create miracles and help people once again remember who they are as souls having a physical life, connected to Universal Source. As a Reiki energy healer Sheryl has and does witness miracles large and small quite regularly. A recent one that can be observed happened in Minnesota when a five year old boy was thrown from the third floor by a very troubled man in a mall and received life threatening injuries. Sheryl cried seeing that beautiful bright smiling young face and sent energy and prayers every day for two weeks feeling as an empath how really serious the injuries were. One day on twitter Sheryl saw a post saying the boy was alert and being moved out of intensive care and Sheryl just thanked God for the miracle of his survival against all odds. Many people must have been sending their prayers and thoughts as well.
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl go on to discuss the emotion that destroys fear and how to experience more of this empowering feeling. Gratitude and love is the opposite of fear. It is possible to experience both emotions simultaneously. If someone can appreciate something in the moment, fear will disappear. And we can always find something to appreciate.
Sheryl says: But for people who tend to run negative or feel the glass is half empty, they may need to be reminded by others who function in a more positive and trusting way and who do inner work to realize what sets off any doubt negativity or sorrow so now in each moment, they have an opportunity to monitor their reactions, check what triggers bad feelings or fear. They may begin to choose ways to respond to events so they are not lingering in old painful feelings and old ways of reacting. It becomes easier as the process is practiced as a ritual and routine, allowing in each moment, new thoughts of being whole and happy which then are incorporated into our heart energy.
Love or feelings of interconnectiveness to the energy of people and events is also a way to know yourself more clearly as a spiritual being having a physical life and remembering you are more than the conflict or challenge. We have an infinitely powerful soul energy that can bring change to any issue being faced by tapping into love and gratitude.
Many experiences as a pastor have taught Pastor Tobin about the negative aspects of human behavior. We learn that people want to dominate and control others because they lack meaning in their life. Many carry wounds from their past and take those hurts out on others. What they don’t realize is they are creating a cycle that never ends until someone says “enough.” The person in pain causes pain, and in return receives more pain. It is the insanity of selfishness.
Pastor Tobin also speaks about a great truth that many people do not know or fail to remember and it is this. Psychologist Irving Kirsch notes, “response expectancy theory” when we expect to feel anxious, relaxed, joyful, or depressed, our expectations tend to produce those feelings. At its extreme such a mindset can even lead to self-induced death as has been well documented by tribes in which a powerful curse is often fulfilled as the person wastes away and dies unless a way to reverse the curse is found. If the person believes the curse is real, death often follows. Such is the power of conviction creating a self prophesying event.
Numerous psychology studies have shown that if a number of people start to ask a person if they are tired or okay or not feeling well, before long, the person might actually start to feel ill because as Morrow notes, “We must realize that once a certain thought is repeated in the mind, there is left in the chemistry of the individual a recorded imprint. As you try to make changes and rid your mind of self defeating thoughts, so we need to change those thoughts and cure ourselves of various upsets and hurts we have endured, remembering which words create feeling and how those feelings affect the way we behave. So it behooves us to eliminate negative fearful unproductive thinking and replace it with positive joyful thoughts and action.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw migh want readers of A Beautiful Lie to take away with them after reading your book what he wrote, “In the United States a woman is battered every 15 seconds by her husband or boyfriend: four of these women die each day. My partner would regularly shake his head and ask night after night, “What is wrong with people?”It seems that confusion and division have become the new norm. But there are men and women of high character in the world, as well as down through history, who like the women whose stories I have told make what are miraculous choices. These champions beckon us to raise our standards, to live different and to know what can seem so impossible become possible.”
The story Pastor Tobin told in regard to this was : When Nelson Mandela was released from prison and became the leader of South Africa he established panels to investigate acts of brutality that had taken place under apartheid. One particular case purportedly involved a woman who was forced to watch her husband be killed by lawless police officers. Unconscionably, the same men had also killed her sons several years prior. Before her husband drew his final breath, he whispered to her, “Forgive them.” Years later the men who committed these atrocities were brought to trial and the judge asked her what she felt would be a fitting punishment. The courtroom waited as the former mother and wife gave her response, saying, “I want three things, “ I want him to take me to the place where the burned my husband’s body so I can gather up the dust and give him a decent burial. Second since I still have a lot of love left in my heart she requested the officer be required to meet with her twice a month so she could be a mother to him. Third, I would like this man to know that he is forgiven by God, and that I forgive him too. At that moment the officer fainted.
When we can forgive the most unforgivable offender we are truly free of anger and fear and embrace only the divine. Not easy but it can be done with strong faith and trust that everything happens according to a divine plan and our souls enlarge with greater compassion and love if we make that choice to trust.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw author of Beautiful Lies: Finding Faith in a World Gone Mad has shared an intensive spiritual journey gathering many stories of spiritual truths in a most expansive and truthful rendering from his many experiences as a military police officer, probation office and mentor to those who transitioned from prison to a halfway house and also gathered religious training and interactions with people who have suffered unimaginable challenges: on the edge of divorce, of contemplating suicide, or being unable to reach a goal and many depressed people who have finally found peace of mind through his sensitive and guided assistance. Pastor Crenshaw has produced a book that brims with wisdom and the quotes and stories of leaders throughout history seeking to know both human and divine nature.
In summarizing today’s episode we have traveled the often untraveled path of engaging our own self-doubt and to find that within us is an alignment through our soul and faith to higher universes of love and eternal life and to build with resilience and hard work the way to loving life and living out our dreams reaching our earthly and spiritual goals and finding peace and happiness.
Pastor Tobin Crenshaw has expressed this eloquently and wrote,” It is widely accepted that there is a vast difference between a justice system and a legal system. The latter is what we have: the former is what we wish was true. From politicians to judges to religious leaders and managers of financial institutes, it seems the further we go along in history, the more people move away from the north. Yet amidst all this, there is an answer, but it will take effort on our part. It will take becoming better. It will mean moving from belief to action and committing to unlearning much of what we have been programmed to believe. It has been well said that a deeper spiritual life and faith will not make your life problem free, but you will come to learn there is a purpose and meaning for your existence. And when you know that you can make a difference.”
Pastor Tobin and Sheryl would have you remember that as an energy being resonating in the love of Spirit and guided through the whispers of inspiration from the many great thinkers artists spiritualists musicians healers and divine souls, it is never too late to make choices that will bring you closer to what makes your heart sing and bring a smile to adorn your face. It could be as easy as finding gratitude and faith in unbounded abundance for living with love. Be loving share yourself and your dreams and create a happy healthy journey for what you think, put your attention on is what we become. Let us become what we already are…Divine!
