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From Suicide Attempt to Success
- Mark Bowness
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In today’s episode of “Healing from Within” Sheryl Glick, Intuitive Reiki Energy Practitioner and author of her newest book, The Living Spirit: Answers for Healing and Infinite love welcomes Mark Bowness author of New Years Revolution, who was like many others, simply going through the motions of a life that had little meaning or satisfaction. It was only after Mark’s marriage breakdown that he realized he was living a life that others desired for him. Mark turned to alcohol and then decided to end his life. As a result of this attempted suicide, Mark writes about an awakening that transformed his beliefs and future, leading to a business called Tribewanted that gained international media attention. He was featured on more than two hundred media outlets on six continents. A book deal followed and he began speaking globally on his transformation from suicide to success. In addition to Mark’s degree in theology, he is trained as an NLP practitioner and also teaches the principles of his organization, Life Change-The Revolution. New Years Revolution is a movement to unite people in pursuing personal, community and world change.
Mark had established a pattern of behavior early in his life that valued his parents and his family’s belief systems. Mark was brought up with the idea that you need to work hard if you want to be loved. Just “being” was not enough. Attention, recognition, affection—all this had to be earned. Mark says “Don’t get me wrong, I grew up in a very loving environment. But for as long as I can remember, the women in my family in particular were “givers” rather than “receivers”. They felt the constant need to provide for and take care of each and everyone - except themselves.” Of course we are aware that this is a very common concept. Actually, Mark (a former co-dependent) used to be exactly like this and still to this day, must catch himself before “flying on the selfless autopilot”. But if he does, he forces himself to switch to “manual self loving”.
When Mark was at the darkest moment of his life, he realized that when anyone is at the deepest place, suffering the darkest pain, the mind convinces you that there is absolutely no hope. Positive words that people say become meaningless. They don’t know your pain. Mark says “When I tried to look into the future, having to start again, to re-build from the ground up, my eyes began to fill with tears. Tears of remorse, regret, pain and what if’s… what if I had done something different filled my mind? I knew that my life would never be the same again. I didn’t like how bleak the future looked. There was absolutely no way that I wanted to move forward in the direction of darkness; it wasn’t an option.”
When asked if Mark’s failed suicide attempt was a cry for help or something more, Mark says “I made a decision to end my life. I remember waking up in a hospital bed. Somehow when I should have died, I lived. I should have no longer been on planet earth, but for some life changing reason I was. The moment I realized that I was alive, that I had not succeeded in taking my own life, I realized an incredibly powerful truth. I had lived on planet earth for 26 years but I had never truly lived. From that day onwards I realized that my life was like a blank canvas ready to paint whatever future I decided. I created a strategy to totally turn my life around. Three months after trying to take my own life I created a business in Fiji that propelled me into the media around the world—I was even featured on Good Morning America and The Today Show. The business that I created was filmed for 18 months and became a 5 part prime time TV show that aired in the UK, America and Australia.”
Mark later went on to study theology and became an NLP practitioner (certified master of neuro-linguistic programming), a hypnotherapist and a master of Time Line Therapy. Mark studied what makes people successful, what makes great leaders, and how to tap into your Unlimited Potential. As George Bernard Shaw say’s “Life isn’t about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself.” You see, there is no need to discover your potential; it is already there. Neuro-linguistic programming, which describes the basic functions between mind (neuro) and language (linguistic) and how their relationship affects our body and behavior (programming) is a means towards knowing yourself better and enabling you to make choices which increase your levels of health and success.
Mark mentions the principles of L.I.F.E Change strategy that he developed to take his life from suicide to success. The process is called L.I.F.E described in New Years Revolution as follow;
L is for Leverage. Each person who wants to change something about their life has one thing in common. They do not have a big enough reason to change in the RIGHT NOW and so their lack of self-control in the short term seems to damage their entire life. Ex. Your partner is frustrating you...if he won’t change, why should I? Your current mind-set is forcing you to live an unhappy life. Your mind-set is justifying your every behavior so that you accept second best for your life. From understanding that no one out there is causing your frustration, it becomes clear that it is your own dissatisfaction with yourself that needs to change. Gain the leverage required to change the area in your life that you so desperately need to change today. Write a description of what your life will look like if you don’t make any changes in your life today. I guarantee you will gain the leverage to make this much needed shift in your life.
I is for intention. There is a universal law that states that for any true, profound change to really take place the desire for this change has to come from a pure and honest place. The Universe is a powerful force that exists to look after your best interests. The Universe has the power to accept or reject the change that you so desperately desire. If your passion for change is not for the good of yourself, your community and the world then you can try everything that you can to force this change into being, but it will never happen. The intention must be a positive and fulfilling one.
F is for focus. When we change the focus of our attention to success our intention has to equally change. Intention is the aim, plan and strategy that you devise to ensure that the focus of your attention is fulfilled. Focus your attention: When you wake up I want you to visualize the day ahead of you in a positive way. Visualize making successful steps towards change in this area of your life. Focus on what it looks like, what it feels like and how different your life is with this aspect of your life totally changed. You are so happy, so confident, and so secure.
E is for Engagement. There is a great story in the bible that exemplifies this issue in mankind, since the beginning of time. Jesus tells the disciples that he is going to pray and that they should stay awake and keep watch and pray so that they will not fall into temptation. Jesus returns and sees that the disciples are asleep to which he cries out the immortal words, “The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak”. You have been stuck in a never ending cycle desperately wanting to change your life, but it has not happened because you haven’t engaged your whole body. Your mind may have wanted this change but when it actually came to it, temptation was overwhelming. If you truly want to change something in your life the issue that you want to change has to be mastered by your whole body.
Sheryl suggests to Mark that what he is suggesting is what Sheryl as a Reiki Master Teacher shows her students must happen when we merge our emotional body with our spiritual or soul essence for a more complete understanding of what life in a physical and spiritual sense is all about. Any separation between our spiritual and physical life needs leads to a less than ideal approach for realizing the opportunities and miracles that are always available to us as soul beings. As soul beings we can create a healthy and prosperous life. By paying attention or being mindful to our actions and the motivating forces for both loving or fearful responses we become aware of our energy and our responses in relationship to the people we associate with. We discover what feels right for us from within rather than what the outside world expects of us.
Mark also shows us the 6 steps to finding your balance which include:
- Step 1: Visualization —your journey to becoming a centered person begins with a clear goal.
- Step 2: Internalization —your mind is a powerful tool, learn how to use it. ( Positive affirmations, start your Day by repeating your current goal and be creative
- Step 3: Detoxification —the mind-body-food connection. The vicious three enemies: poor food, poor health, poor thinking
- Step 4: Mindfulness —seeing what is beautiful today and how to avoid paying for therapy. ( Meditate, exercise, write in a “gratitude diary.”)
- Step 5: Embracing Setbacks—It makes us human. The key to success lies within the way you handle these less fortunate opportunities.
- Step 6: Self Love: --Being true to your most important goals and values, eliminating negative talk about yourself.
Mark has gathered in his on line program for New Year’s Resolutions a wonderful group of mindful, intuitive, holistic medical practitioners, life coaches, and people interested in creating a way for people to realize their highest human potential and to become cooperative conscious and healthy citizens. Some of the people featured are Martha Hansen an EFT Practitioner, Zoe B, Life Coach and author of “Simple Life Strategies blog.” Joanne Law, a NLP Master Practitioner, Conflict Coach, and Mediator/Family Dispute Resolution Practitioner, Award Winning author Lillian Brummet (www.brummet.ca) host of The Conscious Discussions talk radio show.
Mark and Sheryl would like listeners to know that change of any unsatisfactory issue and moving past the smoke and mirrors of our life to the recognition painful limiting issues go hand in hand, and is the first step in order to move forward. Change may or may not happen instantaneously. It is usually a slow and reflective process of rediscovering yourself, what you thought was lost, and what can be found in your new life just as it is. Most efforts at change fail as a result of “3 main causes:” First, there is no holistic change. We may change one aspect of ourselves while other aspects are left intact. Old habits seem too overwhelming and we often quite before making enough necessary changes. Second, We may not be equipped with tried and tested techniques that educate us on how to change. Third, We may seem to be alone in our change and often do not have a community around us to keep us going. By going to Mark and Sheryl’s websites you will find many resources and clues to begin your own self-investigative search and the keys for life changing possibilities.
