Healing from Within

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Our Evolving Society Aided by Using Appropriate Communication

• September 17, 2018
• Richard Kuritz
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In today’s episode of “Healing From Within” your host Sheryl Glick author of The Living Spirit Answers for Healing and Infinite Love welcomes Richard Kuritz a political scientist writer and Public Relations Strategist whose life experiences working with authors and change makers in these turbulent times has discovered that the spoken word intentions and actions all reflect whether we can function in cooperation with each other or create new problems in our relationships impeding progress and success. In other words, what we say, when we say it, and what we really mean are the components of either effective and productive interactions or the opposite of successful communication.

Listeners of “Healing From Within” are well aware Sheryl and her guests share intimate truthful investigative and insightful experiences aimed at learning more about the human and spiritual energies that motivate and help us to create and manifest a healthy purposeful awareness of Self, Nature, the World and Universe…as we truly try to understand life in its many complex aspects.

Richard Kuritz who works as a Media Relations specialist and whose background includes finance, construction and politics will share an independent perspective on America which crosses party lines and is anchored in common sense and the Constitution. Realizing that at this time our national and international concerns must be based on a greater appreciation of communication and how we may improve all issues by understanding the effect we have on each other by the words we chose, by our actions and indeed the appreciation we have for ourselves and for life in general.

Richard thinks back to his childhood and remembers when he was about six years old and living in the projects in New York City and went to a local summer day camp. One day his counselor chastised one of the kids who had a different skin color and Richard spoke up as he didn’t like the way the child was referred to and the words and energy of the discourse made him feel uncomfortable. As a sensitive boy he already knew within that communication was the way to uplift or greatly wound. He has always valued and respected the power of the written and spoken word and a sense of social justice or soul justice.

Richard gives us a clearer view of what communication is and how important it is to begin to use language appropriately effectively and wisely for best results.

First let’s get a clearer definition of what communication is? Communication, gestures, body language, facial expressions, eye contact, and how one dresses. Nonverbal communication also relates to intent of a message. Communication (from Latin commūnicāre, meaning "to share"[1]) is the act of conveying intended meanings from one entity or group to another through the use of mutually understood signs and semiotic rules.
The main steps inherent to all communication are:

1. The forming of communicative motivation or reason.
2. Message composition (further internal or technical elaboration on what exactly to express).
3. Message encoding (for example, into digital data, written text, speech, pictures, gestures and so on).
4. Transmission of the encoded message as a sequence of signals using a specific channel or medium.
5. Noise sources such as natural forces and in some cases human activity (both intentional and accidental) begin influencing the quality of signals propagating from the sender to one or more receivers.
6. Reception of signals and reassembling of the encoded message from a sequence of received signals.
7. Decoding of the reassembled encoded message.
8. Interpretation and making sense of the presumed original message.

The scientific study of communication can be divided into:

• Information theory which studies the quantification, storage, and communication of information in general;
• Communication studies which concerns human communication

The channel of communication can be visual, auditory, tactile (such as in Braille) and haptic, olfactory, electromagnetic, or biochemical.

Development of civilization has been closely linked with progress in telecommunication.

The many wars disruptions anger and violence in all countries at the present time be a decline in how we are being taught to communicate and an influence of social media over the last twenty years Also there are many barriers to effective communication can retard or distort the message and intention of the message being conveyed which may result in failure of the communication process or an effect that is undesirable. These include filtering, selective perception, information overload, emotions, language, silence, communication apprehension, gender differences and political correctness.

This also includes a lack of expressing "knowledge-appropriate" communication, which occurs when a person uses ambiguous or complex legal words, medical jargon, or descriptions of a situation or environment that is not understood by the recipient. Richard and Sheryl discuss the vast amount of information that is being incorrectly expressed as a result of the internet and social media tools such as Facebook Twitter Goggle Instagram etc. and the sheer access to fast distribution of people’s thoughts, possible mis-beliefs, lack of knowledge and a failure to research and find conclusive data before speaking personal opinions. Hence the term “Fake News.”

• Physical barriers- Physical barriers are often due to the nature of the environment. An example of this is the natural barrier which exists if staff are located in different buildings or on different sites. Likewise, poor or outdated equipment, particularly the failure of management to introduce new technology, may also cause problems. Staff shortages are another factor which frequently causes communication difficulties for an organization.
• System design- System design faults refer to problems with the structures or systems in place in an organization. Examples might include an organizational structure which is unclear and therefore makes it confusing to know whom to communicate with. Other examples could be inefficient or inappropriate information systems, a lack of supervision or training, and a lack of clarity in roles and responsibilities which can lead to staff being uncertain about what is expected of them.
• Attitudinal barriers- Attitudinal barriers come about as a result of problems with staff in an organization. These may be brought about, for example, by such factors as poor management, lack of consultation with employees, personality conflicts which can result in people delaying or refusing to communicate, the personal attitudes of individual employees which may be due to lack of motivation or dissatisfaction at work, brought about by insufficient training to enable them to carry out particular tasks, or simply resistance to change due to entrenched attitudes and ideas.
• Ambiguity of words/phrases- Words sounding the same but having different meaning can convey a different meaning altogether. Hence the communicator must ensure that the receiver receives the same meaning. It is better if such words are avoided by using alternatives whenever possible.
• Individual linguistic ability- The use of jargon, difficult or inappropriate words in communication can prevent the recipients from understanding the message. Poorly explained or misunderstood messages can also result in confusion. However, research in communication has shown that confusion can lend legitimacy to research when persuasion fails.
• Physiological barriers- These may result from individuals' personal discomfort, caused—for example—by ill health, poor eyesight or hearing difficulties.
• Bypassing-These happens when the communicators (sender and the receiver) do not attach the same symbolic meanings to their words. It is when the sender is expressing a thought or a word but the receiver take it in a different meaning. For example- ASAP, Rest room
• Technological multi-tasking and absorbency- With a rapid increase in technologically-driven communication in the past several decades, individuals are increasingly faced with condensed communication in the form of e-mail, text, and social updates. This has, in turn, led to a notable change in the way younger generations communicate and perceive their own self-efficacy to communicate and connect with others. With the ever-constant presence of another "world" in one's pocket, individuals are multi-tasking both physically and cognitively as constant reminders of something else happening somewhere else bombard them. Though perhaps too new of an advancement to yet see long-term effects, this is a notion currently explored by such figures as Sherry Turkle.
• Fear of being criticized-This is a major factor that prevents good communication. If we exercise simple practices to improve our communication skill, we can become effective communicators. For example, read an article from the newspaper or collect some news from the television and present it in front of the mirror. This will not only boost your confidence, but also improve your language and vocabulary.
• Gender barriers- Most communicators whether aware or not, often have a set agenda. This is very notable among the different genders. For example, many women are found to be more critical in addressing conflict. It's also been noted that men are more than likely to withdraw from conflict when in comparison to women. This breakdown and comparison not only shows that there are many factors to communication between two specific genders, but also room for improvement as well as established guidelines for all.
• Cultural aspects
  Cultural differences exist within countries (tribal/regional differences, dialects etc.), between religious groups and in organizations or at an organizational level - where companies, teams and units may have different expectations, norms and idiolects. Families and family groups may also experience the effect of cultural barriers to communication within and between different family members or groups. For example: words, colors and symbols have different meanings in different cultures. In most parts of the world, nodding your head means agreement, shaking your head means no, except in some parts of the world.

Communication to a great extent is influenced by culture and cultural variables. Understanding cultural aspects of communication refers to having knowledge of different cultures in order to communicate effectively with cross culture people. Cultural aspects of communication are of great relevance in today's world which is now a global village, thanks to globalisation.

Cultural aspects of communication are the cultural differences which influences communication across borders. Impact of cultural differences on communication components are explained below:

1. Verbal communication refers to form of communication which uses spoken and written words for expressing and transferring views and ideas. Language is the most important tool of verbal communication and it is the area where cultural difference play its role. All countries have different languages and to have a better understanding of different culture it is required to have knowledge of languages of different countries.
2. Non verbal communication is a very wide concept and it includes all the other forms of communication which do not uses written or spoken words. Non verbal communication takes following forms:

• Paralinguistics are the voice involved in communication other than actual language and involves tones, pitch, vocal cues etc. It also include sounds from throat and all these are greatly influenced by cultural differences across borders.
• Proxemics deals with the concept of space element in communication. Proxemics explains four zones of spaces namely intimate personal, social and public. This concept differs with different culture as the permissible space vary in different
• Artifactics studies about the non verbal signals or communication which emerges from personal accessories such as dresses or fashion accessories worn and it varies with culture as people of different countries follow different dressing codes.
• Chronemics deal with the time aspects of communication and also include importance given to the time. Some issues explaining this concept are pauses, silences and response lag during an interaction. This aspect of communication is also influenced by cultural differencesas it is well known that there is a great difference in the value given by different cultures to time
• Kinesics mainly deals with the body languages such as postures, gestures, head nods, leg movements etc. In different countries, the same gestures and postures are used to convey different messages. Sometimes even a particular kinesic indicating something good in a country may have a negative meaning in any other culture.

So in order to have an effective communication across world it is desirable to have a knowledge of cultural variables effecting communication

According to Michael Walsh and Ghil'ad Zuckermann, Western conversational interaction is typically "dyadic", between two particular people, where eye contact is important and the speaker controls the interaction; and "contained" in a relatively short, defined time frame. However, traditional Aboriginal conversational interaction is "communal", broadcast to many people, eye contact is not important, the listener controls the interaction; and "continuous", spread over a longer, indefinite time frame.

Richard tells us we are all in the words game. Just as there are words you can employ to helpful means, there are also words that you should avoid to keep you out of trouble and in control of the buy-sell relationship. Here are seven of them. Seven Words You Can’t Say in Business Development : You Such a harmless word, you, but using it incorrectly can cause immediate credibility loss that is almost impossible to win back. Another word is Partner. Think for a minute about all the people or companies that you hire or might hire in your life or business. You can put most into one of two buckets: 1. I need these people to do what I tell them 2. I need these people to tell me what to do Humans are hierarchical beings. There is little equality in the pack. It is rank that drives order and stability. Rank may change, there may be battles for power, but there are few real partnerships outside of marriage and business (ownership) partnerships. Solutions or Results are another nebulous concept or value based ideology that is difficult to use. Full-Service is another loaded word. I know I don’t need to go on here. Everyone who makes this claim knows they are guilty of saying, “Jack of all trades and master of none. Other words to think of are passion thank you and strategic as using these words in authentically can hinder the progress you seek.

Richard and Sheryl discuss the importance of using the correct word. Sheryl Says….Yes words chosen wisely can move mountains but still no one means to cause harm by their words or actions, but as imperfect fragile beings none of us always has the right word and there are many right words…not just one…Open mindedness is a word that could change many biased and prejudiced events. Open to change and learning to accept oneself and others is probably why souls have chosen to live a physical life It is definitely easier to be willing to listen than to just yell and cause violence—less negative energy is sent out and positive results according to The Law of Attraction can only result from what you are sending out into the world..

If language has to evolve with society- is it wrong to invent words? Do not be afraid to make up your own words. English teachers, dictionary publishers and that uptight guy two cubicles over who always complains about the microwave being dirty, they will all tell you that you can’t. They will bring out the dictionary and show you that the world isn’t there – therefore it doesn’t exist. Don’t fall for this. The people who love dictionaries like to present these massive tomes as an unquestionable authority, just slightly less than holy. But they’re not. A dictionary is just a book. A product, no different from Fifty Shades of Grey and only slightly better written. But you must be careful. Every new word must be crafted. It has to have a purpose, a need. A new word cannot be created with a fisted bash to a keyboard. Like every other word in the language, your new word should be a mash up of pre-existing words. You can steal bits from Latin and German like everybody else did. Or you can use contemporary English in a new way. But you must capture something that already exists, which for whatever reason has been linguistically mismanaged.

Here is an example:
What about public perception—and misperception—should we point fingers. Sheryl goes on to say that many branches of the media and parties seem to have done nothing but point fingers and blame with every word and action of others that they are not in alignment with, instead of noting that we are all hard wired neurologically to process and dispense information in many ways and have many different ideologies beliefs and opinions. In a spiritually evolving world these types of behaviors are painful to many sensitive intelligent folks. Some people are more verbal, some more auditory, some need to sense and feel emotion in order to understand it and because someone is proficient in one way, doesn’t mean they are bad, unintelligent, or not comprehending the situation. Acceptance seems to be in order in regard to good communication and information needs to be given truthfully and accurately. We as unique spiritual beings having a physical life have unique abilities and must not judge others who share their views differently. In other words, those who blame and judge are working from a lower vibration or emotion. They cannot hope to achieve good results, unity, or cooperation with others. With the many problems facing our country and world the continuous assault of the media as a result of a political upset needs to stop. President Trump will complete his Presidency and if the nation is to move past the civil unrest and violence, the leaders in Congress the media and individual citizens must act with reason while they prepare policies, develop new leadership, and work towards achieving their goals patiently and responsibly. Many citizens I encounter are simply feed up with the communication that has been expressed in major news outlets and by leaders in government.

People have strong and differing opinions—can we eliminate conflict about issues with more appropriate communication? Sheryl says: In my book The Living Spirit I suggest by realigning our thoughts to the truth we can eliminate much personal stress and dysfunction and I wrote, “We are each an independent life form and our choices are our responsibility either nourishing our own growth, or making needlessly and unproductive ponder the judgments and actions of others. Anything that is less than accepting of others whatever their condition, allows for separation from our normal state of love. The goal in the search for enlightenment maybe recognizing that while not liking the behavior of “bad” actions the Dali Lama and other highly empowered spiritual leaders have reached a level of detachment allowing them to remain a love based energy finding deeper compassion for the flawed human condition.

When Richard is asked what is the “R” word that nobody likes he responds, “ Responsibility.” Again easier to blame others than to realize you are the creator of your own life story and circumstances. Sheryl says for me the R also represents “Resistance” for in order to thrive in a physical world it is necessary to learn to allow, accept and surrender to change and since we can have no control over anyone or anything, we must not separate ourselves from exploring all options and opportunities to create more love and compassion success health vitality and true joy and that can only be done by working on our personal growth taking no one’s actions personally, allowing others to find their own perception and to not create karma by using negative words, thoughts or actions…Live and let live. We do not create anything but goodness or negativity with the words we utter and must be concentrated on BEING the magnificent soul from within our heart not mind or ego- based reality.

The craft of communication can be learned but it is most especially important that adults children teachers physicians politicians and leaders indeed all of us who cannot afford to misuse language in a harmful destructive negative way learn to appreciate what comes out of our mind and mouth. Energy creates or destroys: words thoughts and actions are energy directed towards others and either create positive or less than positive results.

Richard Kurtz has allowed us today the opportunity to discuss one of the more important challenged each individual, family, nation, and collective communities face which are the ways of effectively using language, words, attitudes, and tone and cultural influences in either a positive or negative force for the improvement of the human condition.

In summarizing today’s episode of Healing From Within we have seen how complicated it is to realize the effect we have on our family and friends as we try to make connections of love but often fall short as the complications of personal ego related fears and labels, and expectations of failure or not being up to the challenges we face confront us. Communication is an acquired skill and one that needs continuous refinement much like our soul journey which is one of creating better relationships through understanding ourselves and the needs of others, compassionately, and with greater empathy. In the silence, sometimes we may communicate that love of life and the Universe without even uttering a word. Our body language, the energy from facial expressions and heart are an important part of interacting effectively. When we don’t have words of love, perhaps we might be silent and wait and ask for guidance. I believe that is also part of effective Universal communication. In these trying times, human nature and world events are guiding us to learn to communicate beyond only national or personal needs and to see the bigger picture of life.

Richard and I hope that it is in finding peace within and more love for yourself life nature and all living things, that you will start to hear and use words of kindness intelligence and caring attitudes.