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Freedom from Suffering Pain - Addiction

  • Mal Duane
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In today’s episode of “Healing From Within” your host Sheryl Glick author of “ Life Is No Coincidence” welcomes Mal Duane author of “Alpha Chick-Five Steps From Moving From Pain To Power” a  passionate and powerful formula for personal transformation and healing.  In reading this autobiographical and self help book Sheryl found many synchronistic remembrances to her own early family life and concluded that indeed all of us share this fractured sense of well being and separation from our divine soul light when family, parents, siblings or friends imprint their own traumatic views of life, unknowingly or knowingly upon us, slowly dampening our own capacity for happiness and evolution.  Along the road to maturity, we must relinquish the fears and limitations imposed upon us by others and reclaim our personal power. It is assumed that women struggle more to move past society’s enforced restrictions for expansion and power, but I believe men are equally traumatized by the personal challenges of those who parent them during their early development.  The question is not “How many families are dysfunctional, but how many are not?“  As listeners of “Healing From Within” are aware, it is the goal of this show to bring people who through challenges have found the courage and divine inner strength to transcend their weaknesses and limitations becoming excellent examples of refined, loving, cooperative, and dynamic forces for change and healing on a personal and global level.

Mal Duane is deeply involved with helping women discover their connection to the Divine power within to become their own version of a highly motivated leader in their communities and personal lives.  Mal Duane has built a multi-million dollar real estate company, and in 2007 built the Katherine Holly School in Mali, West Africa which educates 100 children annually.  She is also the Founder of Holly’s Gift an educational assistance fund for women.  Mal’s new book Alpha Chick is being recognized as one of the best self-help books of the year and a finalist in The Readers Favorite and Global EBook Awards for 2012 Mal is also a certified Personal Life Coach.

As the title of this book is “Alpha Chick”, Mal defines an Alpha Chick as a woman who discovers she is a spiritual being who has worked to deepen her connection with and faith in the divine presence within- which is the continuous source of guidance, passion and personal power in order to  meet life’s challenges with purpose and strength.  An alpha chick is furthermore empowered and awakened to the true beauty of life and then can live the most joyful and creative life bringing in new experiences  with a courageous outlook.  Most women would choose to be such a person, but that means leaving behind blame for any situation you find yourself in, asking for help if needed, and relinquishing any urge to play the role of a victim or drama queen.  Therefore alpha chicks are not born, but develop, evolve, and make choices which lead them beyond any physical, emotional, financial issue or relationship issue to grow into a more loving, compassionate, and accepting human being.

In discussing Mal’s modeling career, her upbringing in a wealthy Boston Family, and her love relationships,  we will share some of the stereotype beliefs, images and impressions that our early family dynamics impose upon us. Many young American woman have been encouraged to buy into a life plan that others deem appropriate. Many of the poor images that have created loss of self-esteem and confidence is a result of the media, parents, teachers and other adult authority figures who for many reasons have not supported young women in healthy and positive ways. Self-esteem and confidence are two important energies for appreciating how truly gifted and precious we all are- male or female. Furthermore, poor examples by adults bring much confusion and unhappiness to our youngsters making it hard for them to  find professional and romantic fulfillment later in life. So, it is not what we tell our children to do, but the example we set by our own actions.

In discussing the Law of Attraction and the Mirroring Aspect of Interactions with others, we begin to realize that if the ego is being fed, but not the soul, we arrive at an impasse in our development. Negative emotions and attitudes such as unhappiness, anger, hate or jealousy  further sabotage our own desires and personal growth.  It becomes clear that unless personal changes are made and we work on improving our thoughts actions and attitude we may not become more accepting of ourselves, others and life in general. Therefore, since we all wish to love, and be loved, we must become more loving. Blaming others rather than assuming personal responsibility for our actions, decisions, choices and behavior cannot change any pattern or addiction such as alcoholism drug abuse, smoking, eating disorders, excessive spending, even exercising beyond healthy limits, or any other unwanted and damaging behavior.

Many people, due to sensitivities or a heightened state of intuitiveness or empathy might perceive the world to be a demanding and threatening place. They may also be more aware of inappropriate or unkind behavior that they observe which less sensitive people might accept. Each person’s perception influences their reality, whether it is actually unfolding the way they see it or not.  Therefore, a person may perceive their place in the family, and their role in life, according to the treatment actually received, or perceived. I think Mal and Sheryl will share that they were spiritually more alert and aware than perhaps others in their family, and desired to explore and find answers to the questions they had about life, death and the experiences that lead to soul growth during the process of living.

In discussing domestic abuse and alcoholism and a pervasive kind of Sexism we will address the fact that the boy’s club mentality and  women attaining higher professional status, has not yet leveled the differences  in business which still rewards men with higher monetary reimbursement for the same work done. There is still discrimination in the workplace for women who have children and need time for this responsibility.  Women may still not be perceived as able or willing to commit  the time and take on the work load that a man can handle.  All these issues have improved over time, but the primitive lower thinking part of the population still react with prejudice and fear as women assume their equal place alongside our male population. Alpha Chicks, unlike Soccer Moms, who are usually very competitive,  excel in more cooperative, unified, and spiritual approaches to fairness and equal treatment. Often unwilling and unable to compromise their virtues and integrity, they succeed regardless of challenges because of this inner personal alignment to the higher values of Spirit.

Mal shares her 5 Step Plan for a Healthy and Vital Life Style

FAITH

Focus—Go within and find the power you were born with
Acceptance and Attitude---Serenity Prayer
Identification and Intention-----Albert Einstein Quote  
Thougths—Norman Vincent Peale
Healing and Helping—Marcel Proust 

In reference to Focus or going within to find the power you were born with- this simply asks that you respect your personal values and share with others your zest for life. When twarted or abused you find a way to move out of limiting circumstances and make change that create a healthy and positive environment for your continued growth.  In referernce to Acceptance and Attitude we can remember the words of the Serenity Prayer---“God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,(people, places,things) courage to change the things I can (my attitudes) and the wisdom to know the difference”. Albert Einstein in reference to Identification and Intention wrote,” We can’t solve problems by using the same kind of thinking we did when we created them.”  Norman Vincent Peal wrote in reference to Thoughts, “Change your thoughts and you change your world.”   Marcel Proust so wisely said in reference to Healing and Helping, “We are healed of a suffering only by experiencing it in full.”

Sheryl’s Reiki training and life experiences much like Mal Duanes have led to the conclusion that in order to heal and grow you must…. Embrace your issue, pain, illness, or challenge, take responsibility for discovering your own life purpose and values and find what makes you uniquely happy, continue to improve yourself and take yourself past all hurt without blaming others, and recognize your spiritual and physical life can become free of the past being here in the moment and accepting the future as it unfolds. 

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